Knee Update-ish

Friday, May 28, 2010

Well, I went to Tria Orthopedics last night, as they offer a walk in clinic until 8. Maybe I didn't have my expectations in line with a clinic's offerings, but unfortunately I left without much more information than that which I had upon arrival.

I should back up to say that although it is a clinic, it is still housed within the main facility, so I was expecting full usage of the resources. All this to say I wasn't able to receive an MRI last night, not that I'm complaining, I just assumed that I would be able to. So that aside, my care was wonderful and the wait wasn't long at all! The doctor was not happy to hear my poppy ketchup description, but . . . wait for it! As he did the whole pull on my loose leg test [Side note: there's a name for it right? Someone help me out, what's it called when you're laid on your back, instructed to relax your knee in the hands of the physician and allow them to jank and pull repeatedly on your knee to see if it catches?], my ACL caught as it was supposed to! The doctor would not guarantee that it didn't have a tear, but he felt confident in saying it was not torn. However, the only bummer is that he does feel strongly that one of my meniscus are torn based on the location of pain.

I will take a meniscus scope and few week recovery over an ACL repair any day of the week, so I'm happy with that!

So, I left with "your knee is causing you pain and may or may not be torn." $25 copay well spent? I think not. Although it did buy me hope!

Bad Break

Thursday, May 27, 2010

Okay, it's not necessarily a break . . . it's more like excruciating pain. Hi, my name is Leah and I can barely walk without grimacing. It's kind of funny how when you're considering your options, sometimes if you take too long . . . God makes the decision for you.

It's easy for me to type these words, because I don't think the reality of their weight has actually hit me: I'm done playing competitive soccer. Wow. I lied. That wasn't easy for me to type at all.

I wasn't near making the decision to quit, but I have been mulling over what a future without soccer looks like. Pondering when the next pregnancy would cut short the next season. When my family's life would be too busy for my favorite pass time. Turns out His plan for me to stop playing soccer was much earlier than my intended.

I've been thinking so much about the end of my playing days for one main reason though, my surgically restructured knee has been bothering me for about three weeks now. When I sit my knee hurts, when I stand my knee hurts and when I stretch my knee hurts. Note to self: Listen to your body.

In a very typical shot on goal last night I twisted my body and wouldn't you know I felt a pop. An eerily familiar pop followed by pain. I limped off the field, but continued to sub in until the 2nd half when I again took a shot, this time the pain featured a warm gooey sensation which flowed over my entire knee. The best way of explaining it is like pouring warm ketchup over you skin, but it was within my knee . . . Both the pop and the gooey sensation I have felt before, in 2003 when I previously tore my ACL.

This is not good you guys, not good at all. Last night was even more uncomfortable than sleeping at 9 months pregnant. I tossed and turned all night, each position putting strain on my knee. My hope was that it would be drastically less painful in the morning . . . but that was just wishful thinking. I'm still continuing to hope that it is either my MCL (heals itself with time) or meniscus (less invasive surgery than ACL), but I'm having my doubts. Everything feels the same, in a really bad way.

Don't even get me started about the costs, but most important of all, if I were to have surgery how am I supposed to care for Isaac on crutches or fulfill my photography obligations? I had a really difficult time recovering when I was 20, how am I going to cope almost 7 years later? One thing is for sure, regardless of if it's torn and/or if I have surgery again my playing days for the most part are done.

I will be going to a walk-in orthopedic clinic tonight. More to come.

Wedded Wednesday

Wednesday, May 26, 2010


Wedded Wednesday is a collaboration
of married bloggers sharing their inspirations,

anecdotes, struggles and thoughts regarding
the amazing union of two separate people, as one.

Tony and I were having a conversation the other day regarding how much we have changed in the past 5 years of knowing each other. One of the things that sticks out to me the most and is pretty trivial has to do with one of the first house projects that I demanded be completed.

Be jealous ladies, be jealous. :)
Photobucket

What pray tell is Tony unearthing? Why that would be the remains of a clothesline. The very first thing that I wanted changed in our new house was to have the clotheslines removed! I'm pretty sure Tony would just die if I ever asked him to install some . . . who would think that 3 years later we'd have a cloth diapered child! Definitely not that naive selfish little 22 year old.

On a similar bend Tony and I used to be known for our perfectionism. Forget the truck commercial that now touts the same line, Tony's living motto was "Measure twice, cut once." I also used to joke about how type A Target Corporate was and that basically everyone who worked there was Type A, but that basically you had to be Type A Tier 1, Tier 2 or Tier 3.

We were discussing our Type tendencies the other night and I was shocked by Tony's analysis. While I was ready and willing to grade myself a C (-) Tony came up with an A -. And for all our change, what really has steadily remained the same is that Tony always thinks well of me. He may complain about my housework, but he has always given me the benefit of the doubt, lavished praise and generally been much kinder than me.

I'm trying to take a lesson from this, as change is inevitable but there are some things that must be resisted. Clearly as our time spent married has progressed Tony has amply viewed my character flaws and yet he chooses daily to still love me wholely. So as you change, remember to continually think well of your spouse, even if they don't deserve it.

Marital Bless Parenting 101

Tuesday, May 25, 2010

I was first going to title this post so that it only addressed our sleeping situation, but really I've never addressed our parenting style, in which the way we sleep is only a small portion!

To this day, I haven't cracked open a parenting book, which is neither something I'm proud of nor ashamed of, it's just a fact. While I was pregnant I got through month 6 or so of my Pregnancy Week by Week and flipped through a copy of my friend's Happiest Baby on the Block. That my friends is the extent of my book knowledge.

When Isaac was born Tony and I just did what came naturally to us, with a lot of trial and error. It was only after perusing thebump and stumbling upon the Attachment Parenting board that I realized there was an actual term, let alone movement behind many of the choices we had made. I actually laughed at the term, all sorts of odd visions conjured in my mind's eye of it's definition. One quick glance at the post titles though stopped me quick, "Hey!" I thought, "That's me."

There was a name for the natural birthing, breast feeding, cloth diapering, baby wearing, bed-sharing, delayed vaxing type of parenting that we thought we had just made up! There are many components to Attachment Parenting, but to be clear I won't claim them all. To me Attachment Parenting is simply what most closely identifies with the choices we have made for the best of our family. Because I'll write it once, I'll say it a thousand times: There are very few instances in a solid right or wrong choice (ie child abuse or similar nature), there are many instances of making the right choice specifically for your child or your family. Unfortunately many people can't bear the thought of not being right and are zealous about converting "bad parents," no matter what the parenting style is.

My friend Kristal did a great job summarizing their AP stance and I couldn't agree more with her comments. If you stop by congratulate her on her new status as a new SAHM! Most of what she's written is exactly how we approached much of Isaac's infancy.

Almost all of our decisions related to AP have been positive and it's only recently that bed-sharing has been on the fence. As with most of our parenting choices, I didn't have much of an opinion until I found myself in the situation. Isaac slept in his bassinet/pack and play from our first night home and eventually began sleeping through the night (5+ hours) at 3 months. The two months between 3 and 5 were glorious and then . . . right at 5 months, I wrote this post detailing Isaac's sudden decision to no longer sleep through the night, er ever, unless it was in our bed. And that was that. We no longer attempted to put him down for the night and I just nursed him to sleep. I slept, Tony slept, Isaac slept = win, win, win. It has continued in this vein for almost 8 months, until I got the harebrained notion that Isaac needed to get out. Soon. As the last few posts have shown though, neither Tony or I are ready and Isaac especially is not! Isaac either sleeps in the crook of my arm on the outside of the bed, without a guardrail or in between Tony and I. Tony from day one has been very aware of Isaac and I've always been comfortable when Isaac is between us. I wouldn't suggest going without the guardrails, but we were too cheap to buy them and have done just fine without! If we do co-sleep with our 2nd we will for sure get a special sleeper or we will just wait until they are older as we did with Isaac. I am uncomfortable bed-sharing freely with a child less than 5 months as that was my experience.

Breastfeeding was definitely a decision that I chose to pursue with absolute dedication. I was blessed to produce for my child, but there were several weeks/months in which it was an absolute battle to maintain. There were several supplements and cravings for pancakes due to my overwhelming syrup odor, but I fought through it and made it to well, now, past my 12 month goal!

My concentration has really deteriorated in this post, I'm sorry! But I just wanted to put my $.02 in where we fall on the spectrum and that ultimately we as mother's should just support each other. We all make different decisions, but honestly there are very few wrong ones. We are all just making the best choices that we can, which is how Isaac ended up in our bed!

Transition to Crib: Night 2

Thank you for your supporting comments yesterday. It really was a terrible night on Sunday! We went over to Aaron's for dinner with him and Missy last night and Tony didn't even have to say much more than "Before I say anymore, I want to hear what you think about . . . " and we were agreed that there will not be another night like it.

So, last night I attempted to nurse him to sleep before placing him in the crib . . .
Nursing (check)
Asleep (check)
Detached from my body asleep in the crib? [FAIL]

Now that we actually have a mattress in the crib, we'll be able to work on laying Isaac down for naps and those nights when he falls asleep early. Previously, we either held him, laid him in the pack and play or even laid him on the floor. Hopefully peppering in naps in the crib will help!

I've been reading as many forums as I can on the topic. I took great encouragement re-reading my friend Erin's experience with her twin boys at 13 months. I mean if she can get through sleep training with twins, who am I to think I have it rough! On the flipside though, there are so many children who between 13-24 months decide that they are done with sleep sharing and either demand their crib or a toddler bed. It truly will happen eventually and a whole lot less traumatically. So, we'll continue to attempt to lay him down via nursing, rocking or other methods, but we will not have a spastic cry it out ferber attempt for the sake of all parties. I really am jealous of the willpower necessary to get through that first night, because I basically knew when we started that we wouldn't be successful. Isaac's just never been a good sleeper . . .

For the time being, it brought Tony and I no greater joy than to snuggle with our little man this morning.

Happiness = Random Photos

Monday, May 24, 2010

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For you Mer!
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Isaac

Transition to Crib: Night 1

Well, here's where we're at last night was our first attempt . . . Isaac slept in our bed last night. Both Tony and I have been teeter-tottering on the issue and questioning whether we're really ready for this. We installed an alarm system, black out shades and the valences. The room looks one step closer to being done, you know almost a year after it should have been, hah!

On AJ's recommendation we did bottle, bath, book, bed. Except bed did not involve sleeping. Instead it was frantic and absolutely terrible, filled with Isaac's screams. I tried to sooth him one minute, then 5 minutes, then 10 minutes out but he was inconsolable. As I reached into the crib to rub his back and shush him, his arm wildly circled as he tried to make contact with my body. It was just too much to handle, so of course I picked him up and attempt to comfort him. No amount of rocking would ease his cries though, so I tried once again to lay him down. Tony and I stood in the bathroom and cried, with the fan and water both on. A few minutes later, Tony went in to comfort him but came out carrying Isaac, his decision made.

I know we have to be strong, but really we both are so comfortable with Isaac in bed with us it's hard to be resolute on something we're not sure we really want to do . . .

Bubbles

Thursday and Friday were two of the most difficult days that I have ever had to endure as a wife, mother, sister, daughter and cousin. The depth of my family's pain was completely tangible.

I took my time Thursday night before approaching my cousin Kristi. There was such a steady stream of people coming to express their condolences, that I didn't think she noticed at all. I was however mistaken. When I finally resolved that not much more could be said than "I'm sorry," I went to speak with her and she turned to me and immediately started crying more stating, "I'm not avoiding you, sometimes it's just more difficult with people who care for you." I tried to convey just how much she is loved, how much her daughters were loved and my hope that she could be comforted by our prayers.

I didn't try too hard to find the "perfect words," but I did attempt to say something with weight based on numerous conversations through the years and of course, the last few days with my Mom regarding Philip's funeral. My Mom has always quoted the best words of sympathy and some of the worst. Although, to her credit, she has blocked the identities of the mis-guided sympathizers. It seems unfathomable that at a funeral or visitation that someone's pain could be deepened, but it's true and I did not want to be a cause!

Isaac was just a few months old at Abbi's service and I remember how difficult it was to witness, as a cousin and new Mom. Abbi's passing however was one of steady progression and it was easy to take comfort in the knowledge that while we mourned her life on earth coming to an end that in truth, during that very time we were assembled her body was whole in Heaven. With Sarah, the speed of her death produced new despair. To view pictures just taken 3 weeks prior of a happy and giggling Sarah was heart wrenching.

The service Friday morning was amazing. I could barely bring myself to sing the first song, "Jesus Love Me." I could also hear my Mom fall apart, as that was a song she spent hours singing to Philip. The single most difficult and poignant moment of the service for me occurred during the singing of the second song "How Great is Our God" which is a song of praise. I came to pieces watching as Kristi and Rob both stood to honor God with strength that humbled me. I was floored and moved in a way I didn't realize I could be. It was just so inspiring and challenged me to my core.

My cousin Josh read a letter prepared by Kristi and Rob and he did exceptionally well. Josh chose to sandwich the letter with his own beginning and end and just blew everyone away. As a doctor with 4 children Josh doesn't make it to a lot of family functions, especially since his wife's family is on the East coast. He began by stating this matter of fact and that he knew he wasn't chosen because of his closeness to Sarah, but maybe for the very opposite fact. He showcased Kristi and Rob's love for their daughters and implored everyone to love with the same ferocity.

Throughout the whole service a bubble machine was operated, as bubbles were Sarah's favorite activity. Isaac would have loved them, but with 7 months separation between Sarah and Isaac I did not want to cause anyone pain in seeing a robust toddler wandering around just as Sarah should have been.

The pastor's message was painfully truthful and yet strangely comforting. To hear a man of God admit that Sarah's death in conjunction with Abbi's has caused him to question his faith is quite disconcerting. You just don't hear someone audible their confusion that often, let alone someone who is supposed to have all of the answers. His solution was simple though, if their deaths caused a loss of faith then the outcome was resigning Abbi and Sarah to death. There is no comfort in that.

Thursday and Friday were absolutely terrible and beautiful to witness. Thank you for your prayers. Please continue to uplift them.

Isaac + Lime = Hilarity

Thursday, May 20, 2010

If there is one thing to put a smile on my face it's this guy. These videos do wonders for me. I hope it makes you smile today as well. Isaac, just like his Mama, loves limes and lemons and thinks nothing of cramming them in for their sourness. He got such a kick out of "feeding" the lime to me and my resulting sour face and scream.


April2010 036, originally uploaded by allpossible.

Watch this one to hear Tony scream like a little old lady. :)



I'll be leaving shortly to attend the visitation. Continued prayers are appreciated.

Turkey Teriyaki Burgers

Wednesday, May 19, 2010

As I mentioned on Monday, we invited my Mom over for dinner. Since Tony was paid last week, I finally went "real" grocery shopping! Not just stopping into Aldi to buy some fresh produce to go with whatever was on hand. It felt amazing.

All that to say, I tried out/made up a recipe for Turkey Teriyaki Burgers. Now to be fair, the recipe was based on a Pork Teriyaki Burger recipe from a cook-off cookbook from 2006, but I made some adaptations.

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Patties
2 lbs Ground Lean Turkey
16 oz Frozen Stir Fry Vegetables (we don't like mushrooms, so our blend included Broccoli Florets, Carrots, Green Beans, Onions, Sugar Snap Peas, Celery, Water Chestnuts and Red Peppers)
1 cup Breadcrumbs (we only had Italian and they worked like a charm)
2 cloves of Garlic
1 tsp of Ginger
Salt and Pepper
2 Green Onions chopped

Sauce
6 oz Yoplait Original 99% Fat Free Orange Creme
1/4 cup Light Mayo
1 Tbsp Teriyaki Sauce (or Reduced Sodium Soy Sauce if you're a Mom and totally space that there's a difference)

Process frozen vegetables in food processor until they are small pieces, refer to picture. Combine chopped vegetables with turkey until mixed well. Add S&P, garlic, ginger and green onions until mixed well. Spray skillet with non-stick spray and on medium heat grill patties for 12 or so minutes, turning once.

In the meantime, combine yogurt, mayo and teriyaki sauce with a metal whisk in a small bowl until well blended.

Place cooked patty on whole wheat burger bun, add a dollop of sauce and garnish with thin slices of cucumber and green onion.

Yield: 8 burgers

Wedded Wednesday


Wedded Wednesday is a collaboration
of married bloggers sharing their inspirations,

anecdotes, struggles and thoughts regarding
the amazing union of two separate people, as one.



Working on it.

Tony and I are really applying ourselves to our marriage right now. We're just at one of those spots - you know, where it's tough. I'm not upset with him and neither he with me, but we're definitely lacking a connection.

When entering marriage, I was very frank with Tony that I would always love him, I just might not be in love with him. I promised to fight through those times though, so that the falling could occur again. By no means are we there right now, this is just a little funk due to difficult circumstances and complacency, but I'm reminded of that conversation.

Marriage is one of the hardest battles I've ever fought, daily. For it must be daily, the choice to love without reservation. We are all broken people, but it's loving past the flaws and continually embracing them wholly. [ps. I totally didn't remember wholly was spelled like that as opposed to wholely.]

We're making a concerted effort to be nice to each other, think of each other's needs, unplug the computer, put away the phones and concentrate on each other. There's been a lot of work lately without much play and I truly believe we have forgotten how to enjoy each other's company to some extent, save watching Parenthood together.

Do you recognize rough patches and communicate through them with your spouse?




Up in the sky!

Tuesday, May 18, 2010

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Thank you for your outpouring of support for my family. There is no such thing as too much prayer and I'm sure that my cousin is wrapped tight in it. The last few days have obviously been trying. It's stupid to say that this has had a larger impact on my cousin and her husband, understatement of the century, I don't want to make light of that fact when I speak to how it has touched Tony and myself. It feels questionable that I should write about how we're coping, when in fact we're somewhat removed from the tragedy. That being said, I only know what's going on in our minds . . .

Based on how Tony and I are dealing with this, my primary prayer has been that Kristi and Rob make it through this together. I don't remember, but have heard the stats for marriages in which a child dies and they were quite dismal. I can't imagine that adding a second child to that total increases the odds. Tony and I have really had our eyes opened in regards to our differences and there has been a complete lack of communication.

The visitation and funeral will occur on Thursday and Friday. I would ask that you continue to pray for my family during this time. We will not be bringing Isaac to either. Last year at Abbi's funeral Isaac was only a few months old and the age difference was large enough that I did not feel circumspect having him there. This time though, with only a few months difference between himself and Sarah it would seem wildly inappropriate to me to bring him. Not even necessarily for Kristi and Rob's benefit, as I'm sure they would be too wrapped up in their grief, but more so for other family members. I may be over thinking it, but I still think it's for the best.

To make matters worse for my Mom, my Stepdad was literally just about to walk out the door for a job in Ohio for the next year when we received the phone call. Seeing him off was the purpose of our visit. I have not always been the most gracious to my Mom, nor understanding, but being a mother has definitely softened my heart and filled some gaps. Last night, aware of the pain she is in and that she was alone, I invited her over for dinner. Even though she cares for Isaac daily, it is with the commotion of several other kids. It was quite the treat for her to cuddle Isaac while he slept on her chest, as I busily made dinner in the kitchen. After dinner Tony, Isaac, my Mom, Allie and I went for a walk. It was a good evening and the purpose was not lost on my Mom.

So again, thank you. Thank you. All we have is prayer right now and you are being so generous with it.

Even Worse

Sunday, May 16, 2010

Tony and I were visiting with my Mom and Stepdad this afternoon when my Mom received the phone call. You could visibly see my Mom's heart go into her throat as she picked up the handheld. The origin of the phone call was immediately clear.

Just one day after losing the ability to move her limbs, Sarah passed away this afternoon in the comfort of her parents arms.

To some extent it was good for us to be with my Mom. She's taken the deaths extremely hard, due in part to her being Kristi's aunt, but especially since she did daycare for both Abbi and Sarah. She was forced to be the whistleblower for both, calling attention to the little symptoms. She has also had to recall my brother's death and knew all to well what they were experiencing with the loss of Abbi. Kristi and Rob have now surpassed her in grieving not one, but two children.

I have copy and pasted their most recent caringbridge update. I am praying, praying, praying because I know that I am tormented by their situation and want nothing but peace for them.

"Today at 1:00 Sarah joined her sister Abbi Rose in heaven. Our two beautiful angels are together once again. Sarah died in our arms, at home, quietly and peacefully, just as her sister did less than a year ago. Abbi did all the fighting so Sarah wouldn't have to; she journeyed down that road so her little sister wouldn't have to. It was Abbi's ultimate gift to Sarah.

Our angel now has wings.

We will love you forever our sweet silly Sarah,

Love,​
Mommy & Daddy"

In less than one year's time they will have buried both of their daughters. Please, please join me in raising them up in prayer.

Bad News: Sarah Ann

Thursday, May 13, 2010

I really apologize for the lack of sunshine and rainbows around here, but unfortunately the doom and gloom seem to be prevalent.

Some of you may remember my sharing Abbi's story and ultimately her death. I did not want to ever update that story, as it should have been complete, but it wasn't. Abbi's younger sister, Sarah, with whom my cousin was pregnant when Abbi first suggested problems, was admitted in December with similar symptoms of Abbi's undiagnosed disease. There was a brief period where a doctor diagnosed Sarah with GBS, a small victory, as Abbi failed diagnosis!

Last week however, after a full day in the OR, that diagnosis was shattered after an MRI showed the development of the same changes in brain stem as Abbi had suffered. There is no cure, there is no diagnosis, there has only been resignation.

Kristi and Rob have made the agonizing decision to forgo traching and venting as they did for Abbi. My mind can not comprehend the weight of that decision. They do not know how long they will have with Sarah, but I'm asking that you pray for Sarah Ann, her parent's Rob and Kristi and our family.

To follow their story, you can receive an update through their caring bridge. They kept it the same, as there were already so many invested in Abbi.

Break in the Clouds

Wednesday, May 12, 2010

After a gloriously warm April, Minnesota has reverted back to 40's and even had snow last weekend. It's been such a funky weather pattern that I've actually forgotten a few times what month, let alone season it is. While yes, there has been some drama of late, I think that the weather has put a huge damper on my emotions.

I'm trying to pull it together and am so happy to have viewed next week's forecast!

78* on Tuesday. I can handle that, especially if there's some sun this weekend.

Wedded Wednesday


Wedded Wednesday is a collaboration
of married bloggers sharing their inspirations,

anecdotes, struggles and thoughts regarding
the amazing union of two separate people, as one.



From my Power of a Praying Wife desktop.

May 12th.

Fear is the enemy of faith. It keeps us from moving into the life God has for us. Significant things happen in our lives when we don't allow fear to rule the situation. Pray for your husband to be free from fear.


Challenge yourself to pray this over your husband and yourself.

Imagine the possibilities, don't dwell on the lack of security.



Beat.

Monday, May 10, 2010

I'm just so worn down and utterly beat today. Nothing seems to be going right. You know when you have a day so draining, you know you're going to wake up sick? That was me Saturday, realizing the sickness yesterday and now I'm at work wondering why I'm not in bed . . . but that would have been the right choice and I'm all about not making those recently. Instead, I seem to be going out of my way to disappoint others.

I need to spend more time with my husband, stress-free. I can not for the life of me imagine when it will happen though . . .

Today is the Monday of all Monday's. Lord, give me wisdom because I'm clearly lacking it.

It just doesn't seem to matter right now.

Isaac's Dedication

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We chose to have Isaac dedicated as opposed to baptized and while the post will mainly transcribe his dedication, I'd like to take the time to explain the act of dedication. I haven't seen a blog post explore this topic or choice that I can remember, so I'm assuming there may be some misguided notions on what it is or is not. There may even be some hot buttons pushed, so I really hope that I am prepared enough to approach the subject.

On that note, let me start with a sermon quote from Pastor Morris Vaagenes of North Heights Lutheran Church. On this particular Sunday, Pastor Morris began his message by proclaiming, "Today I will be preaching on that which all churches agree on when it comes to baptism." He stood silent at the pulpit for a moment or two, then turned to his seat without saying another word.

While opinions can vary greatly, truth can always be established by turning to the Bible. In God's Word, baptism is linked with new birth or life, an inward cleansing, the washing away of sins, union with Christ, becoming part of the church and even salvation. While there are scriptures to support all of the above occurrences, there is no set blueprint or formula. Coupled with this it is recognized that several scholars have arrived at differing interpretations of the biblical texts. Due to this the church that Tony and I belong to allow the parents to decide whether to baptize or dedicate their child.

While it is true that Tony and I were dedicated, rather than choose out of complacency, we made our choice based on the following:

  • Jesus was baptized as an adult.

  • Jesus blessed children but never baptized them.

  • All of the biblical examples of baptism were converts.

  • Baptism is linked to repentance and faith.
Our pastor provided great insight into the choices regarding dedication versus infant baptism and enlightened us to the fact that there is no example of infant baptism or for that matter a verse forbidding their baptism. Just one verse on either subject would have ended the debate before it began. His position is that the debate almost seems designed to keep those who have been baptized as infants from being lulled to complacency and that those who claim to have made a "decision for Jesus" could be cautioned from taking credit for God's salvation as opposed to His grace and our faith making it possible.

We were lucky enough to have the dedication audio recorded and I would like to keep it for posterity. The below was given by Pastor Chris.


This is kind of awkward to read through, but I transcribed it from the audio:

Let me read a passage of scripture. This is out of Mark Chapter 10. People were bringing little children to Jesus to have him bless them, but the disciples rebuked them. When Jesus saw this, he was indignant. He said to them, "Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of God belongs to such as these. Truly I tell you, anyone who will not receive the kingdom of God like a little child will never enter it." And he took the children in his arms, put his hands on them and blessed them.
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And that's what we're going to do today, as we dedicate Isaac. Before we ask Jesus to bless Isaac, which is what we're doing in command of the scripture we're going to pause to remember that godly parents and a loving church family are probably the most tangible source of blessing there is. So what we're going to do before we dedicate Isaac, we're going to dedicate ourselves. So I have some questions for you guys and they are not trick questions, as I promised.

Tony and Leah, is it your intent to dedicate yourselves to the Christian nurture of Isaac? Will you pray for Isaac and with him? Will you faithfully involve him in the life of the church? Will you teach him to know and love God's word and set an example for him to follow? And will you as parents encourage Isaac to one day receive Jesus Christ as his personal Lord and Savior? And encourage Isaac to be baptized into the larger family of Christ?

To which we responded: "We will with God's help."

Now to us as a church body, we're in this together as well. As those who are in Christ, we are members of the same family and this means we are to both welcome Isaac and support his parents, including those times . . . when they need the extra support!

So, as God's people will you make a commitment to pray for Isaac as God leads, to encourage him when God gives the opportunity, to be nice to him in the doughnut line, and set an example for him as you follow in the footsteps of Jesus? And as God's people, will you also make the commitment to pray for Tony and Leah as God leads, to encourage them as God gives the opportunity, to flash them an understanding smile when Isaac is having a meltdown, because we need those, and to set an example for them as you follow in the footsteps of Jesus?

To which the congregation responded: "We will with God's help."

All right, well Isaac. How're you doing? [Isaac is giving him the glare-down] You know what? Jesus wants to bless you. And so, we are going to anoint you with oil and follow the example of scripture and pray for your blessings.

[Pastor Chris then anointed Isaac with oil in the sign of the cross on his forehead in the Father, Son and Holy Spirit.]

And then let's pray for him and his family.
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Father, we come to you and we ask that everything you want to do in this life will come to pass. We pray for your protection, that no weapon formed against him will ever prosper. We pray that your spirit will fill him from this point forward, if not earlier. Lord, that your spirit will stir in him. His name means laughter, Lord will his life bring joy to you. May his life bring joy to those around him, as you fulfill your plans and purposes in his life. Lord, we pray that one day he will understand consciously your great love for him, how deep and wide it is. Lord, we pray that he will discover the gifts that you have for him. Lord, we pray that he never has a day where he feels distant from you or from others who are called by your name. So Lord we ask that all of these things will come to pass in his life. And we also pray for Tony and Leah, God that you will equip them as parents. Give them everything that they're going to need to be the parents that you want them to be. Lord, protect them and help us as a broader family to encourage and support this family. So Lord, we dedicate this life to you. He's your's Father. More than any other family, he first and foremost belongs to you. We ask for all of these things in your name, Amen.
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For those of you closing your eyes when we prayed, Isaac gave me a high five in the middle of the prayer. [Totally missed this, but a few people had their eyes open and were laughing!]

Friday Mish Mash

Friday, May 7, 2010

- Wasn't my last post amazing?! I'm so glad that so many of you were able to get out of it the same as I did! Again, thank you you know who you are and I just wish I had access to your cashed check, so that I could know for sure! :)

- We still haven't gotten paid for Tony's mileage or the last 4 jobs that he completed with his former work. They are maintaining that they haven't been paid . . . cough ::bs:: cough

- Tony is working now . . . but we still haven't gotten paid. Do you see a reoccuring theme here? If you remember my highly confusing post about the business opportunity you may remember that they will have the opportunity to purchase Company B. Well before that purchase they actually signed a contract to deed and both Tony and Scott have been working at Company B for the past 1 1/2 weeks. This is good for my husband's well being and mental soundness, however it's almost an hour from our house and when we are paying for gas without pay it makes me cranky.

- What also makes me irritated is the adjustment from having my husband be home sometime in the afternoon to now being unsure when I will see him walk through the door, whether it is 6:30-8:00, due to the aforementioned distance. But, as I said, it's an adjustment and having him working is a good thing! I just need to get used to the change in our family schedule.

- As I said above Tony and Scott have not been paid by either Company A or Company B . . . but the upshot is that they control Company B's payroll and will be responsible for cutting their paycheck on Monday! Lord have mercy, I might faint to see a check come in other than my own. :)

- Isaac's still super cranked out about his ear infection. Today is day 10 of amoxicilin and I don't think it's solved our issues. My poor bubs.

- To clarify my Wedded Wednesday, blogger won't let me change the formatting and apparently the lack of a paragraph caused some confusion. I am not pregnant. I only thought it was funny Tony thought I would just change our family plan without conferring with him or at least that's what his question sounded like.

- To clarify on weaning. We are still bed-sharing and Isaac nurses at bedtime and throughout the night. I have stopped pumping at work and my body seems to have adjusted easily! Our next step in the process will be getting Isaac to sleep in his crib, which is when the final feedings will cease.

Abundant Charity

Thursday, May 6, 2010

So the other night I came home a little later than normal. I lugged myself, baby and mail into the house and situated Isaac with his favorite toys as I went through the mail. I didn't know what to make, as I haven't gone real grocery shopping in at least a month, and there was no rush anyway because Tony wouldn't be home for awhile.

A personal card had caught my eye as I'd walked up the driveway, but waited to open it until last, assuming it was a late birthday card for Isaac. A bill of course drew my attention, and as I searched the due date I almost forgot about the fun piece of mail. As I turned the letter over my mind was elsewhere, only focusing on the task at hand when I noticed that the envelope was unsealed, which always alarms me. Weird too was the fact our last names were not included in the address.
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My mind was slowly creaking to deduce the source of the card as I read the "Thank You" on the front. There had not been a recent baby shower, wedding shower or wedding. I could not for the life of me think of why we were receiving a thank you, especially a real card, let alone a token note card sized one.

And then I opened it.
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There'd be no knowing who it was from. The card blank and unsigned, save the imprinted message of gratitude. In my life I've never experienced a moment like that. I was instantly crying as I threw the card to the countertop, quick to cover my mouth with my hand in disbelief.

I'm pretty sure you're reading and am almost as sure that I know the source, but can not confirm my haunch. Thank you. Your generosity is amazing and is not without awe.

Wedded Wednesday

Wednesday, May 5, 2010


Wedded Wednesday is a collaboration
of married bloggers sharing their inspirations,

anecdotes, struggles and thoughts regarding
the amazing union of two separate people, as one.


Tony and I have spoken at length regarding the when's and where's needing to be hammered down in consideration of expanding our family and I thought we were on the same page . . . until.

Driving home from softball.
Tony: So, after hearing all of this talk about being pregnant yesterday, what are you thinking?
Me: What do you mean, "What am I thinking?" I'd be pregnant yesterday if it weren't for life and stuff and bleh.
Tony: So does that mean our plans have changed?
Me: You think I would just decide to change our plans?
Tony: Well, I just want to make sure I know what you're thinking.

Remember that whole submission post I wrote? I think I should probably revisit it if my husband thinks I would single handedly change the course of our family plans without conversation with him or prayer!


Weaning Phase II

Monday, May 3, 2010

My first day at the new job is today! Whoo hoo. Let me just tell you, I'm digging it. Although, I really need to tone down the use of the word awesome. There are better adjectives to intersperse and yet I always come back to awesome. That said, my new job is awesome! No more phone reports, queue calls or ridiculous situations!

In addition to my floor move and new responsibilities, there is another huge change occurring. Phase II of weaning. Last week we transitioned Isaac to whole milk after a progression of mixing cow milk with breast milk to the point that he now drinks straight cold cow milk. FYI: when you say cow milk people look at you funny, but it needs to be said because after a year of saying breast milk I'm using the other option now!

This weekend worked out great as well for weaning, as I 2nd shot a wedding with Gina Saturday and we ran ragged yesterday. I did not nurse Isaac once during the day either day, nor did I pump. These two girls were going on 12 and 14 hours by the time we were settling in for the night both days. I will say that this weekend definitely left me wanting quality time with my son. I missed him. He's not a snuggler, so our time to nurse was my point to reconnect with the little guy.

Phase II of weaning is actually pretty difficult on me right now, as I'm no longer pumping at work. I felt positively light as a feather walking into work this morning lacking that ugly brown bag, but at the same time I haven't been able to shake the feeling that I'm missing something or that I'm supposed to be doing something. Isaac will now drink cow milk and my milk is not needed, so I'm working on leveling out my supply slowly. I think that after a week or so of this, we will try to transition Isaac to the crib.

Yes, I just broke out into a cold sweat and achieved the impossible as my stomach is now up in my throat. Just typing that Isaac will not be in our bed and half the house away from us upsets me terribly! If only there were a bed room just across the hall, but there is no hall let alone a bedroom and so it must be . . .
 

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