Drama, because I just need more.

Monday, December 15, 2008

Right? You disagree, I shouldn't have more drama? Well, that's too bad for you and me, because I do.

Today, we were informed that the company made a cost cutting decision to change our insurance plan to a high deductible plan . . . so that manageable $3,000 that Tony and I thought we would have covered between hockey and my waitressing? Yeah, it's now $6,000.

This needs to be avoided. I'm praying to be guided in the right direction in my job search, and trying to remain faithful, but I'm slipping. The littlest things are causing mini-breakdowns. I'm making up for all of the tears I didn't cry in the first trimester. Like keeping the car lights on and draining the battery, even though there was no pressing errand and fully accesible jumper cables. Didn't matter, I was a blubbering mess. Or Angeli calling me today to give me the most reassuring conversation that I've had since this whole mess began. Two sentences in I was running to the bathroom to cry.

I just don't see any good coming out of this, and I know that's half of the point, I will never know the mind of God. Right now though, a little bit of peace would do my body so well.

The silver lining, all though not one of my top two positions that I've applied for, I have a phone interview scheduled for Wednesday. Please pray. I haven't had to do this for a while and it's for a position that I'm overqualified for and the same time have no experience with, in my opinion making it even more difficult to reassure that I would be happy in this position.

23 comments:

Ashley said...

Thinking about you!

Kaitlyn said...

Praying for you! For now, don't worry about being happy in a position-- be happy if you get a position!

Madeline said...

Oh sweetie, it's been awhile since I could post...but I have been thinking of you! Right now I am a babbeling mess too (and I have no pregnancy hormones to blame it on).

Sometime you have to let the crying out. And then when it's all done, remember one thing you are greatful for :) Hopefully your sad tears will turn to happy ones soon!

Julia said...

Ew, that sucks, Leah. I'll be praying for you guys. Stay positive!

Chelsie said...

You have every right to let the tears fall right now. Praying for you and sending well wishes your way.

Leah said...

Oh my! I am praying for you! Don't worry about the crying. You are definitely entitled to get your emotions out.

You will find something soon!

Sarah said...

My thoughts are with you and Tony right now. Let me know if I can be of any help! Hugs!

Mrs. McB said...

I'm praying for you!!

jennifer said...

So sorry to hear about the insurance drama. That's not what you guys needed to hear right now. But know that He has a plan for you and if you trust in that it will all work out. And, most importantly, you have a beautiful growing family!

Good luck on the interview!

High Heels & Mascara said...

Good luck girl! I will be praying for you!!!

Megan said...

Aww, Leah. I'm in tears for you! I will be praying everytime this comes to mind.

Erin said...

Wow, your company just keeps getting better, huh??? I know you'll do great on Wednesday!

Lindsey said...

Praying for you friend!

Meredith said...

You will do wonderful on Wednesday. I'll be thinking about you and praying for you. I KNOW how hard it can be when it feels like everything is going wrong :(

Kristal said...

I'm so sorry Leah. I'm praying for you guys!

Mrs. A said...

praying for you!

abby said...

My oh my, life just keeps getting better doesn't it? Would a nice lasagna dinner help? :)
Keep crying if you need to and of course keep praying too! Good luck on your interview - if nothing else it's a warm-up interview for the positions you REALLY want!

BTW when I say your "Right?" at the top of the post I couldn't help but lol a little :)

Jessica said...

I followed a link on Amber's blog to come here.... I love your blog! Congrats on your pregnancy, and please don't worry about everything. God has a way of providing when it seems least possible, and everything will be okay. It will.

bekah said...

they can do that? in the middle of your pregnancy? how lame. Im so sorry, praying for you!

Rebecca said...

I'm thinking about praying for you. This verse from Habakkuk 3:17-18 is very uplifting to me, and I hope it brings you encouragement:
“When the fig tree does not bud,
and there are no grapes on the vines;
when the olive trees do not produce,
and the fields yield no crops;
when the sheep disappear from the pen,
and there are no cattle in the stalls,
I will rejoice because of the LORD;
I will be happy because of the God who delivers me."

AmberDenae said...

Oh Leah, I am so so sorry that all of this is happening to you at once. It's not fair and you're right, it doesn't make sense. I can relate.

Sometimes, I get so frustrated and I can't find God anywhere in the midst of all the turmoil and string of bad news and it can be very depleting.

I am praying for you. Praying for peace to consume you completely. Praying for favor and financial blessing to you and Tony at this time. Praying that you would be able to rest and enjoy this pregnancy without all of these things hanging over your head.

I hate that you keep getting bad news. :( Hoping this turns around for the better...and SOON!!

Hang in there...

The Branches said...

Praying for you and crossing my fingers it will all go well! You have been through so much lately :( Just remember that God IS in control of everything, sometimes it is so hard to see that, but He is! You are just in a valley right now, but the good thing about being in a valley is the only way you can go is UP from there! Becky

Joi said...

Oh, Leah. That just sucks. I'm trying to stay positive for you and know good things will come your way.

You and your entire little family are in my thoughts and prayers! : )

 

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